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Watch 4k Mp4 Porn What are some funny pick up lines Video 10:51 min.

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I wish I were cross-eyed so I can see you twice We're not socks. But I think we'd make a great pair. Your lips look so lonely…Would they What are some funny pick up lines to meet mine? He must have been to make a princess like you.

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Rejection can lead to emotional stress for both parties involved and emotional stress can lead to physical complications such as headaches, ulcers, cancerous tumors, and even death! Did you have lucky charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious! No wonder the sky is grey today, all the blue is in your eyes. Can I borrow your cell phone? I need to call animal control, because I just saw a fox! Hershey's makes millions of kisses a day.. Of all the beautiful curves on your body, your smile is my favorite. I'm not actually this tall. I'm sitting on my wallet. When I first saw you I looked for a signature, because every masterpiece has one. Does your father sell diamonds? I like Legos, you like Legos, why don't we build a relationship? Baby I might not be Sriracha sauce but, I sure will spice up your life. People call me John, but you can call me tonight. Was you father an alien? Because there's nothing else like you on Earth! 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Charizards are red, Squirtles are blue, if you were a Pokemon, I would choose you! So, what do you do for a living besides always making all the men excited and warm all over? Could you please step away from the bar? Are you from Russia? I was so content with my life and one day I asked God, what could be better than this? And then I met you. Most guys need 3 meals a day to keep going I just need eye contact from you. Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see! There's only one thing I want to change about you, and that's your last name. I didn't see any stars in the sky tonight, the most heavenly body was standing right next to me. Is your dad a terrorist? Because you are the bomb! I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you. There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it. Do you work at Dick's? Cause you're sporting the goods. You must be a hell of a thief because you stole my heart from across the room. 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Because you look magically delicious! No wonder the sky is grey today, all the blue is in your eyes. Can I borrow your cell phone? I need to call animal control, because I just saw a fox! Hershey's makes millions of kisses a day.. Of all the beautiful curves on your body, your smile is my favorite. I'm not actually this tall. I'm sitting on my wallet. Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears! They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you. For some reason, I was feeling a little off today. Is your name Rapunzel, cause I need a girl who never leaves the bedroom and constantly wants me to pull her hair. Have you ever milked a cow before? Yo must be scissors, cause your looking sharp. Girl coming out of a bar: I'm like a celebrity going to a party, I always make a big entrance and I never cum early. I'm addicted to you. Someone farted. Let's get out of here. 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Because you're the only 10 I see! Are you a beaver? Cause daaaaaaaaam! Life without you is like a broken pencil Do you want to see a picture of a beautiful person? Cause I'm lovin' it! Even if there wasn't gravity on earth, I'd still fall for you. Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you? I wish I were cross-eyed so I can see you twice We're not socks. But I think we'd make a great pair. Your lips look so lonely…Would they like to meet mine? Are you a parking ticket? Thank god I'm wearing gloves because you are too hot to handle. If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas. I'm no photographer, but I can picture us together. Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night? If you were a chicken, you'd be impeccable. How much does a polar beat weight? Enough to break the ice! Are you a 90 degree angle? Cause you are looking right! Are you Israeli? Cause you Israeli hot. On a scale from 1 to 10, you're a And I'm the 1 you need. Did it hurt? When you fell out of heaven? If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together..

I must be dancing with the devil, because you're hot as hell. Are you the moon? Because even when it's dark, you still seem to shine.

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I never need to see the sun again because your eyes light up my world. How much does it cost to date you? Cause damn, you look expensive! If you were a steak you would be well done.

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One, two, three, four, I declare a tongue war. Hickory Dickery Dock, it's time to suck my cock. Girl your backside must be a cannon cause that ass is banging Do you like pirates? Cause I got a lot of seamen that wanna meet ya. Yaharrrr You look much more attractive in person than you do through my telescope. Baby girl you remind me of a tide pod so clean until I eat you then make me poisoned in your love I'm like a firefighter I find them hot and leave them wet. I'm French Horny for your tromboner. Want to buy some drinks with their money? I like your boooty arrrgh You don't have to wait until midnight to see my balls drop. Girl are you a bong because I would hit that. Which social movement do I have to participate in, to fight for the right to be the love of your life? Roses are Red, Violets are blue, give me some head while I'm taking a poo. Are you a drug, cause I marijuana take you home with me tonight. How about your red phosphorus coating and my short stick get together? Cuz its obvious we're a match. I love you with all my butt, I would say heart, but my butt is bigger. Hey let's play carpenter, first we get hammered, I get some wood, and then I nail you. Are you a pirate? No, then where did you get all that booty? Your belly button is in the wrong place! It should be on top on mine! Because that would be super. I don't mind a little ketchup on the hot dog as long as the bun is tight. Baby, you've bought yourself a cruise on the Love Boat. I'll be your captain. I spilled skittles down my pants. Do you want to taste the rainbow? Are you a thrift shop? Cuz yo tags aren't the only thing I'll be popping. How about I teach you about firefighting by letting you slide down my pole Nice pants, can I test the zipper? You are young and fun-loving, that gives you 10 points. Then you are blonde, that gives you five points. At 20 points you get my phone number. Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants! Are you religious? Hey, tie your shoes! You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy. What has 36 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper. I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you. I know you're busy today, but can you add me to your to-do list? If you were a steak you would be well done. Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart. Are you cake? Cause I want a piece of that. My love for you is like diarrhoea, I just can't hold it in. Are you lost ma'am? Because heaven is a long way from here. There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it. If you were a library book, I would check you out. Are you a cat because I'm feline a connection between us If I were to ask you out on a date, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question? If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing? I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment? I must be in a museum, because you truly are a work of art. You spend so much time in my mind, I should charge you rent. My lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow? Well, here I am..

What are some funny pick up lines It's dark in here. It's because all of the light is shining on you. Your hand looks heavy. Let me hold it for you. Do you have any raisins? Are you a kidnapper? Because you just abducted my heart. Is your name Katrina? Can you pull this heart-shaped arrow out of my butt?

A damn little kid with wings shot me. I've already fallen for you.

Anilos pussy Watch Video Xxxwwm Vedio. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy. What has 36 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper. I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you. I know you're busy today, but can you add me to your to-do list? If you were a steak you would be well done. Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart. Are you cake? Cause I want a piece of that. My love for you is like diarrhoea, I just can't hold it in. Are you lost ma'am? Because heaven is a long way from here. There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it. If you were a library book, I would check you out. Are you a cat because I'm feline a connection between us If I were to ask you out on a date, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question? If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing? I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment? I must be in a museum, because you truly are a work of art. You spend so much time in my mind, I should charge you rent. My lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow? Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes? Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only 10 I see! Are you a beaver? I heard there is a yard sale back at your house, so lets get you out of those old clothes. Your eyes are as brown as the Hudson river I'm hot, can I take your pants off. You stole my heart, so can I steal your last name? I find your lack of nudity disturbing You remind me of my appendix. I don't know you, but something inside me is saying I should take you out. It's a good thing I wore my gloves today; otherwise, you'd be too hot to handle. Hey did you drop something? Ummm What? Hi, Can I domesticate you? Do you have a New Year's Resolution? I'm looking at mine right now. Let's ring in the New Year with a bang! You must work in a library because you just increased my circulation! Well if I were a painter, I'd put you down in paint. I'd hang you by the Mona Lisa and put that girl to shame. Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you? I'd like to be the flu so I could spend a couple of weeks with you in bed. Omelette you in on a secret. You and I would brie perfectly gouda. Life would be feta if we were togetha. We'll be grate. I like Legos, you like Legos, why don't we build a relationship? Let me tie up your shoes because I do not want you to fall for someone else. Hi, I'm doing an organ donation campaign, would you like to give me your heart? Hey babe, are you an angel? Cause I'm allergic to feathers. My parents said I should follow my dreams. Your like my false teeth, I can't smile without you. I ain't no hipster, but I can make your hips stir. Girl are you my new Phone? Cause I can't stop staring at you in public. Hey baby, are you an angel? Because I'm allergic to feathers. Do you have a map, because I want to find my way into your pants. Are you a magician? Because your making my penis levitate. Hey, my name's [insert your name here] and I can disappoint you in ways you've never imagined. Are those space pants? Because your ass is taking up a lot of room. If I were a tractor and you were a plow, I would definitely hook up with you. Didn't I see you in Girls Gone Wild? If I'm a pain in your ass, then we can just add more lubricant. Just say yes now and I won't have to spike your drink. Hey Girl If you were a book then I wouldn't be able to read you, cause your print is so fine. Are you a parking ticket? Was you father an alien? Was your father a thief? Tell you what, give me yours and watch what I can do with it. Sorry, but you owe me a drink. Don't tell me if you want me to take you out tomorrow. Just smile for yes, or do a back flip for no. Don't forget here at LaffGaff we also have a huge collection of funny jokes and other entertainment for you. Cheesy Pick Up Lines. Corny Pick Up Lines. Are you a vampire? Cause you looked a little thirsty when you looked at me. Can I hit you in the face You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall When I first saw you, I knew we could win the Stanley Cup in tonsil hockey. My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me any time you want to. Can you take me to the doctor? Because I just broke my leg falling for you. You must be a ninja, because you snuck into my heart I need a dollar, but I only have 90 cents Made in heaven! Your eyes are blue, like the ocean. And baby, I'm lost at sea. You know how they say skin is the largest organ on the human body? Not in my case. My lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow? They say dating is a numbers game You treat me right, and I'll do it your way. Ask a person for the time 9: So today is May 1, , at 9: Pinch me. If I had to choose between breathing or loving you, I would say "I love you" with my last breath! My tooth hurts! I'm not trying to impress you or anything, but I'm Batman! You must be from Pearl Harbor, because baby, you're the bomb. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy. Do you know karate? Because your body is really kickin'. You must be a high test score, because I want to take you home and show you to my mother. Wanna be one of them? I hear they banned you from school lunches for being so sweet. I need some answers for my math homework. Are you a Snickers bar? Cause you satisfy me. Is your last name Campbell? Cause you're "mmmm Baby, you are so fine I could put you on a plate and sop you up with a biscuit. Is there a rainbow today? Because I just found the treasure I've been searching for! You remind me of a magnet, because you sure are attracting me over here! Hey, is it just me, or are we destined to be married? I have an "owie" on my lip. Will you kiss it and make it better? Let's make like a fabric softener and 'Snuggle Hi, my name is Doug. That's "god" spelled backwards with a little bit of you wrapped up in it. If I could reach out and hold a star for everytime you've made me smile, I'd hold the sky in the palm of my hand. Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes? Put your fingers on the other's nipples Hey, here's name , comin' at you with the weather. Can I be your warm front? How much does a polar bear weigh? Hi, I'm insert name here. Well, I AM telepathic, and I can tell that you love me. Should I smile because we are friends, or cry because I know that is what we will ever be? When I look into your eyes, it is like a gateway into the world of which I want to be a part. Hey baby. You got a jersey? Hello, I'm doing a survey of what people think are the cheesiest pickup lines. So, do you pick 'Do you come here often? Is your last name Whitman, because I want to sample you. On a scale of 1 to 10, you're a 9. I'm the 1 you need. Hey baby, I must be a light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn me on! Are you a beaver? Cause daaaaam! I hope your day has been as beautiful as you are. Is your father Little Caesar? Cause you look Hot 'n Ready. If you were a chicken, you'd be impeccable. I could use some spare change and you're a dime. I'm no mathematician, but I'm pretty good with numbers. Tell you what, Give me yours and watch what I can do with it. Didn't I see you on the cover of Vogue? Excuse me, I don't want you to think I'm ridiculous or anything, but you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I just felt like I had to tell you. Have you always been this cute, or did you have to work at it? Hey, don't I know you? Yeah, you're the girl with the beautiful smile. Is your father a mechanic? I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me? I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away! I just had to come talk with you. Sweetness is my weakness. I think I can die happy now, cause I've just seen a piece of heaven. Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living? I sneezed because God blessed me with you. Is it hot in here or is it just you? Nice to meet you, I'm your name and you are I may not be a genie, but I can make all your wishes come true! Was your dad king for a day? He must have been to make a princess like you. Were you arrested earlier? It's gotta be illegal to look that good. Were your parents Greek Gods, 'cause it takes two gods to make a goddess. What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room? What's that on your face? Oh, must just be beauty. Here, let me get it off. Hey, it's not coming off! I blame you for global warming You are the reason men fall in love. You know the more I drink, the prettier you get! You know, I would die happy if I saw you naked just once! You better call Life Alert, 'cause I've fallen for you and I can't get up. You're single. I'm single..

Cause I'm lovin' it! Are you a microwave oven? Cause you melt my heart. Did you get your license suspended for driving so Https://srilankan.seogive.me/video10711-dapele.php guys crazy? Are you a girl scout, cause you tie my heart in knots. You're so hot, I could bake cookies on you. You look beautiful today, just like every other day.

What are some funny pick up lines

Let's play Winnie the Pooh here get my nose stuck in your honey jar. When I'm older, I'll look back at all of my crowning memories, and I'll think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you. If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.

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Is your car battery dead? Because I'd like to jump you. I'm lost. Can you tell me which road leads to your heart? Where do you hide your wings? Is your name Mickey? Are you made of grapes? For a moment I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Twenty20 is asshole an bradbury Ray. I should have been a singer.

More From Thought Catalog. Get our What are some funny pick up lines every Friday! You're in! Do you want to taste the rainbow? Are you a thrift shop? Cuz yo tags aren't the only thing I'll be popping. How about I teach you about firefighting by letting you slide down my pole Nice pants, can I test the zipper?

You What are some funny pick up lines young and https://srilankan.seogive.me/pub12701-cahabimav.php, that gives you 10 points. Then you are blonde, that gives you five points. At 20 points you get What are some funny pick up lines phone number. You look a bit tired. Getting laid would do wonders for your complexion.

I call my dick Notorious, cause it's B. I know milk does a body good, but baby, how much have you been drinking? It's a celebration bitches! Now show Rick James your titi's! Well, then I guess you know what I'm here after.

Is your name Rapunzel, cause I need a girl who never leaves the bedroom and constantly wants me to pull her hair. Have you ever milked a cow before? Yo must be scissors, cause your looking sharp.

Girl coming out of a bar: I'm like a celebrity going to a party, I always make a big entrance and I never cum early. I'm addicted to you. Someone farted. Let's get out of here. I heard you like bonfires, well I'll supply the wood. Are you a pirate because I'm wondering were you got that booty. I'll be wiz khalifa and you can be my joint. Hey What are some funny pick up lines you a window cause I can see right through them clothes.

My wife doesn't understand me. You remind me of my little toe! Why, is it because I'm small and cute? Nope, because I'm probably going to bang you on my coffee table when I'm drunk.

He's got a paintbrush! Me without you is like a nerd without braces, a shoe without laces, ASentenceWithoutSpaces. If you were a Pirate would your parrot be on this sholder hand on closer sholder or this sholder? I hear you like Bolts, well let me teach What are some funny pick up lines how to screw "You've stolen my heart away.

Luckily, I've got another three or four in the freezer. Hey you looking for a stud in your life? Are you a drum? I'd love to feel your hot-cross buns. Do you know the best way to stop back pain and lose 20 pounds? Get a penis reduction; it worked for me! Is your dad a lumber jack because every time I look at you i get a wood in my pants. I am conducting a field test of how many woman have pierced nipples. Sex is a killer Call me a pirate and give me that booty Are you an architect?

I'm afraid I was blinded by your beauty. I'm going to need your name and phone number for insurance purposes. Don't tell me if you want me to take you out tomorrow. Just smile for yes, or do a back flip for no. Don't forget here at LaffGaff we also have a huge collection of funny jokes and other entertainment for you.

Naked turkish girls pics. Funny pick up lines are always handy because you never know when you're going to meet the person of your dreams.

And you may only get that one chance to make your mark. Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? Do you wanna go upstairs and talk?

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Hi, I'm doing a survey What's your name? What's your phone number? Are you free next Saturday? I think there's something wrong with my phone.

Pornstar mali Watch Video Pornemon. Do you wanna go upstairs and talk? Hi, I'm doing a survey What's your name? What's your phone number? Are you free next Saturday? If you were a library book, I would check you out. Are you a cat because I'm feline a connection between us If I were to ask you out on a date, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question? If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing? I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment? I must be in a museum, because you truly are a work of art. You spend so much time in my mind, I should charge you rent. My lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow? Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes? Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only 10 I see! Are you a beaver? Cause daaaaaaaaam! Life without you is like a broken pencil Do you want to see a picture of a beautiful person? Cause I'm lovin' it! Even if there wasn't gravity on earth, I'd still fall for you. Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you? I wish I were cross-eyed so I can see you twice We're not socks. But I think we'd make a great pair. Your lips look so lonely…Would they like to meet mine? Are you a parking ticket? Thank god I'm wearing gloves because you are too hot to handle. If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas. I'm no photographer, but I can picture us together. Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night? I like Legos, you like Legos, why don't we build a relationship? Baby I might not be Sriracha sauce but, I sure will spice up your life. People call me John, but you can call me tonight. Was you father an alien? Because there's nothing else like you on Earth! Life without you would be like a broken pencil If I had a penny for every time I thought of you, I'd have exactly one cent, because you never leave my mind. Are you a 45 degree angle? Is your name Dunkin? Because I Donut want to spend another day without you. Do you like Star Wars? Because Yoda only one for me! Call me Shrek because I'm head ogre heels for you! Do you have advanced radiation poisoning? Because you are glowing! Kiss me if I'm wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right? If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents. If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing? Hello are you married? You are like a candy bar: Hello how are you? Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them. How was heaven when you left it? Did you fart, cause you blew me away. You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. Let's get out of here. I didn't know that angels could fly so low! There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you. You are so fine, I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of you! Is your last name Gillette? Because you are the best a man can get. Is your name "swiffer"? Excuse me, but you dropped something back there" What? Are you going to kiss me or do I have to lie to my diary? Are you cold? You look like you could use some hot chocolate Well, here I am! Did you die recently? Cause girl, you look like an angel to me. I could lay next to you forever Baby, you're so sweet, you put Hershey's outta business. Wanna go bowling? I thought it might be right up your alley. Is your name Dwayne Johnson? Because you Rock my world! Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money? Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me? So there you are! I've been looking all over for YOU, the woman of my dreams! Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? Inheriting eighty million bucks doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart. You see my friend over there? The only thing your eyes haven't told me is your name. Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too. As she is leaving Hey aren't you forgetting something? Somebody better call God, cuz heaven's missing an angel! Can I borrow a quarter? If I were a transplant surgeon, I'd give you my heart. Are you Willy Wonka's daughter, 'cuz you look sweet and delicious. Do you remember me? Did it hurt? Did what hurt? When you fell out of heaven? I'm sorry, were you talking to me? I know milk does a body good, but baby, how much have you been drinking? I play the field, and it looks like I just hit a home run with you. I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment? If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'U' and 'I' together. If you were a tear in my eye I would not cry for fear of losing you. If your heart was a prison, I would like to be sentenced for life. My lenses turn dark in the sunshine of your love. What time do you have to be back in heaven? You'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire. Was your father a thief? I love you like a pig loves not being bacon. Are your parents bakers? Cause they sure made you a cutie pie! Did you go to bed early last night? From the looks of it, you got your beauty sleep. What's on the menu? Me-n-U You're like pizza. Even when you are bad, you're good I'd say God Bless you, but it looks like he already did. I must be in a museum, because you truly are a work of art. My friend thinks you're kinda cute, but I don't I think you're absolutely gorgeous! Let's commit the perfect crime: I'll steal your heart, and you'll steal mine. You spend so much time in my mind, I should charge you rent. If kisses were snowflakes, I'd send you a blizzard If stars would fall everytime I would think of you, the sky would soon be empty. You know, Dr. Phil says I'm afraid of commitment Want to help prove him wrong? Do you like Mexican food? You look cold. Want to use me as a blanket? Blue eyes, red lips, pale face. So pretty. You look like the flag of France. Even though there aren't any stars out tonight, you're still shining like one. If you were a potato you'd be a sweet one. Please call an ambulance, your beauty is killing me. Are you my phone charger? Because without you, I'd die. Are you a hipster, because you make my hips stir. Are you a cat? Cause you are purrrfect I wish I was cross eyed, so I could see you twice. I should have been a singer. More From Thought Catalog. Get our newsletter every Friday! You're in! Follow Thought Catalog. Babe, you wanna play a game? Not hide n seek! Because its impossible to find a girl like you! Did you sleep in a garbage can last night? Because you are looking trashy! I may be hung like a tic-tac, but I'll leave your breath minty fresh! I wanna put my thingy into your thingy. Is your dad a donkey? Cause you have a great ass! If your were a stamp, I'd lick your backside and send you to funkytown. She knew her place. But in a good way. If you were a drug, I would overdose! Baby I last longer than a white crayon. Can you be my nothing? I got arrested the other day. But today ain't one of those times. Now what's your name? Shes says No "Well you just blew me away"! Do you have Diabetes? Cause your the sweetest girl I have ever met. I need a dollar but I only have 90 cents Do your parents compose classical music? Cause baby got Bach! I wish I were cross-eyed so I can see you twice Hey do you want to be on top of the world? If so can I be your world? I have a dirty weekend planned. Do you know what I'm going to do? Three loads of laundry. My favorite singer is Mick Jagger. He can't get no satisfaction, and neither can I. Want to help me change that? Did I tell you I'm filthy rich and my mother's dead? I advise you to surrender immediately, or I'll have to use a pick up line. Excuse me, My name is Ben Dover bend over. Would you like to meet my friend Master Bates masturbates? Or should I do it for you? I haven't seen my ex-wife for over ten years. Nobody else has either; I'll never tell. If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing? If you come home with me, we can do whatever we want Roses are Red Violets are Blue, How about I put this D inside of you If you were one of the three little pigs and I was the big bad wolf, instead of blowing your house down I would blow you kisses. People say I remind them of a cute teddy bear; I weigh pounds, I'm really hairy, and I sleep all winter. People keep telling me that I'm overweight..

Could you try calling it for me to see if it rings? Can I borrow your phone? I need to call God and tell him I've found his missing angel.

Hey, I just noticed you looking at me across the room.

Holeyfuck girls Watch Video Sex postures. Are you free next Saturday? I think there's something wrong with my phone. Could you try calling it for me to see if it rings? Can I borrow your phone? I need to call God and tell him I've found his missing angel. Have you been to the doctor's lately? Cause I think you're lacking some vitamin me. Do you generate electricity with water through the process of hydro power? Because dammmm. Do you like science because I've got my ion you. Are you my appendix? Because I don't understand how you work but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out. Do you like sales? I know this is going to sound cheesy, but I think you're the gratest. If you were a triangle you'd be acute one. Does your left eye hurt? Wow, when god made you he was showing off. Is your name Wi-fi? Because I'm really feeling a connection. If looks could kill, you'd be a weapon of mass destruction. Do you have a tan, or do you always look this hot? Can I follow you home? Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams. If I were a cat I'd spend all 9 lives with you. Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile. Are you from Japan cause I'm trying to get in Japanties. If you were a fruit you'd be a fineapple. I'll give you a kiss. If you don't like it, you can return it. Did you swallow magnets? Cause you're attractive. Are you from China? Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. By Rania Naim Updated November 6, Twenty20 photo. You look a bit tired. Getting laid would do wonders for your complexion. I call my dick Notorious, cause it's B. I know milk does a body good, but baby, how much have you been drinking? It's a celebration bitches! Now show Rick James your titi's! Well, then I guess you know what I'm here after. Is your name Rapunzel, cause I need a girl who never leaves the bedroom and constantly wants me to pull her hair. Have you ever milked a cow before? Yo must be scissors, cause your looking sharp. Girl coming out of a bar: I'm like a celebrity going to a party, I always make a big entrance and I never cum early. I'm addicted to you. Someone farted. Let's get out of here. I heard you like bonfires, well I'll supply the wood. Are you a pirate because I'm wondering were you got that booty. I'll be wiz khalifa and you can be my joint. Hey are you a window cause I can see right through them clothes. My wife doesn't understand me. You remind me of my little toe! Why, is it because I'm small and cute? Nope, because I'm probably going to bang you on my coffee table when I'm drunk. He's got a paintbrush! Me without you is like a nerd without braces, a shoe without laces, ASentenceWithoutSpaces. If you were a Pirate would your parrot be on this sholder hand on closer sholder or this sholder? I hear you like Bolts, well let me teach you how to screw "You've stolen my heart away. Luckily, I've got another three or four in the freezer. Hey you looking for a stud in your life? Are you a drum? I'd love to feel your hot-cross buns. Do you know the best way to stop back pain and lose 20 pounds? Get a penis reduction; it worked for me! Is your dad a lumber jack because every time I look at you i get a wood in my pants. I am conducting a field test of how many woman have pierced nipples. Sex is a killer Call me a pirate and give me that booty Are you an architect? Because you just erected a monument in my pants. Good news, the test results are negative! You wanna see a donkey show? Hey, somebody farted. Those are nice legs. I have 4 words for you "Hol I Day Inn". Babe, you wanna play a game? Is your dad a drug dealer? Cause you're so Dope! Smoking is hazardous to your health Are you Hurricane Katrina? Me without you is like a nerd without braces, A shoe without laces, aSentenceWithoutSpaces If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me? Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon. Because you make me feel all bubbly inside! Please call , because you just made my heart stop! You're so hot, that if you ate a piece of bread, you'd poop out toast! Is your name Ariel? Cause we Mermaid for each other! Charizards are red, Squirtles are blue, if you were a Pokemon, I would choose you! So, what do you do for a living besides always making all the men excited and warm all over? Could you please step away from the bar? Are you from Russia? I was so content with my life and one day I asked God, what could be better than this? And then I met you. Most guys need 3 meals a day to keep going I just need eye contact from you. Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see! There's only one thing I want to change about you, and that's your last name. I didn't see any stars in the sky tonight, the most heavenly body was standing right next to me. Is your dad a terrorist? Because you are the bomb! I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you. There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it. Do you work at Dick's? Cause you're sporting the goods. You must be a hell of a thief because you stole my heart from across the room. Do you have a twin sister? Then you must be the most beautiful girl in the world! You know I'd like to invite you over, but I'm afraid you're so hot that you'll skyrocket my air-conditioning bill. Excuse me, but I think I dropped something. MY JAW! When God made you, he was showing off. If you were a booger I'd pick you first. Do you know what I did last night? I looked up at the stars, and matched each one with a reason why I love you. Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Oh wait, it's just a sparkle. If I were to ask you out on a date, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question? If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib. You must be a very important textbook passage, because seeing you is the highlight of my day. Are you a magician??? You wanna know what's beautiful? Read the first word again. Your lips look so lonely Would they like to meet mine? My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in. Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart. You're so hot you would make the devil sweat. Hey baby you're so fine you make me stutter, wha-wha-what's your name? How come you're not on top of a Christmas tree? I thought that's where angels belonged. Do you have the time? Your legs must be tired because you've been running through my mind all night. Wouldn't we look cute on a wedding cake together? Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I'll give it back. I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true. Would you grab my arm so I can tell my friends I've been touched by an angel? Didn't I see your name in the dictionary under "Shazaam! If a thousand painters worked for a thousand years, they could not create a work of art as beautiful as you. Rejection can lead to emotional stress for both parties involved and emotional stress can lead to physical complications such as headaches, ulcers, cancerous tumors, and even death! Did you have lucky charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious! No wonder the sky is grey today, all the blue is in your eyes. Can I borrow your cell phone? I need to call animal control, because I just saw a fox! Hershey's makes millions of kisses a day.. Of all the beautiful curves on your body, your smile is my favorite. I'm not actually this tall. I'm sitting on my wallet. When I first saw you I looked for a signature, because every masterpiece has one. Does your father sell diamonds? I like Legos, you like Legos, why don't we build a relationship? Baby I might not be Sriracha sauce but, I sure will spice up your life. People call me John, but you can call me tonight. Was you father an alien? Because there's nothing else like you on Earth! Life without you would be like a broken pencil If I had a penny for every time I thought of you, I'd have exactly one cent, because you never leave my mind. Are you a 45 degree angle? Is your name Dunkin? Because I Donut want to spend another day without you. Do you like Star Wars? Because Yoda only one for me! Call me Shrek because I'm head ogre heels for you! Do you have advanced radiation poisoning? Because you are glowing! Kiss me if I'm wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right? If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents. If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing? Hello are you married? You are like a candy bar: Hello how are you? Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them. How was heaven when you left it? Did you fart, cause you blew me away. You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. Let's get out of here. I didn't know that angels could fly so low! There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you. You are so fine, I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of you! Is your last name Gillette?.

I'll give you a minute to catch your breath. Is your name Google? Because you're the answer to everything I'm looking for. I'm afraid I was blinded by your beauty. I'm going to need your name and phone number for insurance purposes.

Don't tell me if you want me to take you out tomorrow. Just smile for yes, or do a back flip for no. Don't forget here at LaffGaff What are some funny pick up lines also have a huge collection of funny jokes and other entertainment for you. Cheesy Pick Up Lines. Corny Pick Up Lines. Cute Pick Up Lines. The Best Funny Pick Up Lines Ever Funny pick up lines are always handy because you never know when you're going to meet the person of your dreams.

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